I Want To Be

I want to be thin, because I feel like carrying extra weight makes me seem irresponsible and a little bit sloppy.

I want to be in shape, because it's embarrassing to have to catch my breath when I carry the baby up the stairs.

I want my long hair back, because it made me look more feminine.

I want to be a good mother, because Calvin deserves it.

I want to be a good housewife, because I'm sick of doing freakout panic mode cleaning whenever people come over so that I can pretend that I am.

I want to be organized, because I can't find anything when I actually need it.

I want to be back in North Carolina, because I miss it and in some strange way I'm afraid that if we don't go back soon it will have turned on me and it won't be the place I love so much.

I want to have a tan, because albino skin isn't even cute on sparkly vampires.

(Not attractive.)